Get Right For The Winter Workout Tape

Sex and Cash, folks. That’s what we’re here for.

But before we build, we must lay foundation. Can a fat slob or a skinny hipster kid make money and get laid? Absolutely. Similarly, Terry Fox ran five thousand kilometres across Canada with only one leg. Possible doesn’t mean optimal.

If you are a man who isn’t eating and training to optimize your health, you are effectively sawing off your own leg before you start the great marathon we call life. You are putting yourself at a huge and unnecessary disadvantage in every minute of every day, all so you can avoid the slight discomfort and short-term deprivation of eating right and exercising. This is pure weakness.

So priority #1 is getting big, lean, and ripped to shreds. I’m going to go from this:

To this:

In the next two months.

Current stats are 6’3 and 205lbs. I have no idea what my max lifts are, since it’s been almost a year since I’ve tested them, but it’s probably safe to assume they’re somewhere between “kitten” and “bunny wabbit.” I’m in reasonably good shape for a twenty-seven year old North American male. But Sex and Cash is not for men who are satisfied with reasonably good anything.

So, gentle reader, here is the Choose Your Own Adventure section of this blog post.

Are you presently engaged in a rigorous and well-thought-out program of intense resistance training and healthy eating? If so, keep up the good work. Share your program in the comments, and let me know what you think of mine. As iron sharpeneth iron, so one man sharpens another.

If not…

Well, one option is to click on the back button up and to your left. Read some more blog posts that you never intend to act on. See what’s happening on Reddit. Play some video games, eat some junk food, go to bed late.

Option #2, which is obviously what I’m cheering for, is for you to Man Up and join me for two months of discipline. Option #2 is simple. Don’t ask questions, don’t make substitutions, don’t even give yourself the option of failing. Just decide, right now, to follow the program below exactly for two months, starting on September 10th.

The choice is yours, friend. The weak and afraid are free to leave now. For the rest, here is the official kid-tested, mom-approved Sex and Cash Fall Fitness Challenge workout plan:

Monday (Chest and Back)

Bench press 5 x 5

Pull-ups 5 x Failure

Incline dumbbell press 5 x 5

Bent-over rows 5 x 5

Flyes/Upper back pulley exercise superset 5 x 10

Tuesday (Legs)

Deadlifts 5 x 10

Squats 5 x 10

Straight-leg deadlifts 5 x 20

Quad extension/Hamstring curl superset 5 x 20

Wednesday: Arms, Shoulders and Core

Shoulder press 5 x 5

Shoulder flyes 5 x 5

Shrugs 5 x 5

Barbell curls 5 x 5

Skullcrushers 5 x 5

Incline situps/Back Extensions superset  5 x 10

* * *

And here is the official Sex and Cash diet plan. You can eat as much as you want of the following:

– Meat (preference for grass-fed steak), eggs, fish, fowl

– Green vegetables, salad, onions, tomatoes, cauliflower, radishes

And you may eat reasonable quantities of:

– Fruits

– Nuts

– High-fat dairy

The following are absolutely forbidden, except on your cheat day:

– Grains, pasta, oats

– Processed foods

– Sugar

* * *

Saturday is your cheat day. You may eat whatever you want on Saturday.

You will supplement with Zinc, Magnesium, Fish Oil and Whey Protein.

You will get at least seven hours of sleep per night

You will fast for 24 hours, starting Thursday evening at six PM

You will lift HARD and HEAVY. Most gym goers are little sissies who never even get close to actual failure. If you aren’t scaring the civilians with your grunts, you’re not working out hard enough. Your ability to lift like a man will be the number one determinant of your success or failure on this program.

* * *

I could add many more details – and in fact I already have, in the first chapter of the Freedom Twenty-Five Lifestyle Guide – but we could sit here and discuss minutiae for the next two months, or we can get our asses underneath some metal.

So who’s in? Commit to it right now in the comments, and let me know if you have any questions.